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RIT Professors Frustrated by Students' Pestering
Professors with regular office hours are shocked to find that students actually show up for them. These students stop by and ask the professors questions about their coursework. It is unsure if this is a RIT student conspiracy to slow down the professor's office work, or something more sinister. This article comes in the light of more frequent student visits during professors' office hours. It tends to happen at this time every year. Freshmen finally discover the concept of an "office hour," and attempt to exploit it. Students with registration problems aggravate this, but the more regular visit is for help in a class. With these visits comes a barrage of student questions.
"Most of these questions are downright stupid." Dr. Fingerpick commented, "Why can't any of these students know the material before they come nag me at my office?" Dr. Fingerpick is a rectal engineering technology professor -- an expert in his field. He is a consultant for other departments, ranging from physics and electrical engineering to photography and entertainment.
At a technical institute such as RIT, higher learning is kept to a minimum, and emphasis is placed on method and job placement. Hence, efforts of better understanding the fundamentals driving a course are met with fanatical resistance.
"The ones that really tick me off come in and ask me all these extra questions about the stuff. What is their problem?" Dr. Fingerpick commented, "I show them one way to do it in class, why do these people keep coming in to find out more about it?"
Dr. Bootlegger is a professor of shoe repair. He has worked out a tried-and-true method for repairing shoes that he imparts onto his students. Like more RIT professors, he is flabbergasted when students ask him about other ways to do things.
"It reminds me of my Ph. D thesis defense. All these people kept biting my ankles with questions." Dr. Bootlegger lamented.
"Now the boot is on the other foot. I already got my Ph. D, but why do I still have to deal with this?"
So it seems that professors feel threatened by these questions. This is natural -- it is important that engineers, scientists, and technologists in general sound intelligent. Questioning these individuals is akin to a threat. It demeans their hard-earned reputation that is backed by a piece of paper.
A popular method in solving the annoying student problem is to hold office hours, but never honor them. The ploy is helped by never responding to student emails for setting up appointments. Dr. Halberdier of the pike engineering department uses this technique. It took over 2 weeks to set up an interview with him due to the difficulty in contacting him. Once met, he turned out to be friendly after realizing we were there to boost his ego, not deflate it with serious, coursework-related questions.
"If they want to see me, they can just call me at my office."
Dr. Halberdier never mentioned what his number was, and neglected to mention his phone was not even plugged into the wall. This brings in the fourth and final part of the ploy -- act oblivious to the matter.
Another method that sometimes works is to yell, "I'M BUSY!" at students whenever they knock on the door, then slam the door on them.
"I used to do that," Dr. Halberdier mentioned, "but some kid stuck his foot in the way of the door like those door-to-door salesmen and Jehovah Witnesses do. He mentioned something about trying to reach me for 3 weeks to go over a test or something. What a dick. I had to take a different approach after dealing with that kid."
Professors and faculty have learned to loathe the registration weeks, especially for the freshmen and sophomores. More than likely, these students will encounter problems registering for one or more courses, and set out on their quest to sign up for the courses they need to graduate. In some cases, a professor's approval is necessary, forcing these students once again to hunt these people down and waste their time.
"These bastards form a line outside my door and act like I'm supposed to do something about it." Dr. Scavak, said. He is the department head of the aforementioned rectal engineering technology department. These students and their "special needs" not at all impress him. Dr. Scavak says, "It is important to remind the students who is the boss and refuse to give in. If they want the course with a certain professor, make sure they never get it." While Dr. Scavak does not teach many courses in one year, he still has to keep the program and its students under control.
Rumor has it that there are professors that are warm and hospitable to students. Local professors deny this. "Associate professors don't count," Scavak said, "because they don't have tenure." It is true that associate professors have to be nice to everybody because their position relies on it. "I remember when I didn't have tenure." Dr. Halberdier said with a laugh, "I had to be nice to people. I'm not too good at that." Another rumor that borders on an RIT "brick myth" is of the tenured professor who helps his/her students. So the rumor goes, this person has a warm smile and a kind heart, coupled with just the right amount of discipline to keep the students working hard. "That's complete bull." Halberdier responded, "We may have had one awhile ago, but we got rid of him for being too soft on the students." Professors have their own form of peer pressure, and it covers the new professors in a veil of conformity.
"The institute doesn't pay us to help students." Dr. Scavak told us. He mentioned that the professors try to get rid of the students as quickly as possible.
One method of getting the students out of the professors' hair is quite crude -- fight students with students. Teaching assistants, tutors, and mentors are now being employed to handle inquisitive students. Professors finally have an excuse not to help the students. Now they send them off to the assistants. These individuals, in turn, follow their own doctrine regarding their handling of questions. They also occasionally disregard their hours.
A tactic unique to these student helpers is the regurgitation of the textbook. Students who have questions are merely shown where the answer could be in the textbook. The helper then reads the textbook for the student until the student gives up and leaves.
"I feel like I'm actually helping somebody," Stephen Munchie told us, "because some of these people are illiterate and they need my help." We were told he gets $10/hr to do this. "It costs a lot of money," Dr. Bootlegger said, "but we can usually get a corporation to kick in a grant for it."
Professors that are tired of asshole accusations rely on the TA's as a smokescreen. Instead of directly being the prick, the professors put the pressure on the TA's, and force them to pack the heat. This includes lab assistants, and especially graders. Professors can then claim innocence when confronted about a poor grade. "I make them talk to the graders," Dr. Halberdier told us, "and that tends to get rid of them quick."
The main frustration the professors' have is that these students are not satisfied with the lectures. In between the complicated whiteboard notes, 20-minute summaries, and occasionally incorrect statements is the material necessary to pass the course. Students must learn to take it or leave it, and don't ask questions. In the real world, one's career can depend on this. So these courses try to teach more than the material, they try to teach life's important lessons. In conclusion, Dr. Bootlegger had this to offer:
"In the real world, it doesn't matter if you solve the problem, just that you sound smart. I sound smart in my lectures, so I've done my job. These students have to learn to stop thinking about the material so much and just 'do it.'"
POSSIBLE PULL QUOTES:
"Why can't any of these students know the material before they come nag me at my office?"
At a technical institute such as RIT, higher learning is kept to a minimum, and emphasis is placed on method and job placement.
Professors have their own form of peer pressure, and it covers the new professors in a veil of conformity.
"The institute doesn't pay us to help students."
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